Bedroom Insider

A blog about relationships, intimacy and sex toys.

Friday, March 29, 2019

A Guide to Impact Toys

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Have you ever fantasized about a good spanking? Do you love the sound of leather hitting skin? Have you ever looked at a whip, flogger, or paddle, and wondered what it would feel like? If so, you might be interested in impact play and the wide variety of toys that can be used for it. In BDSM and kink, “impact play” is the practice of consensually hitting someone with something for the pleasure for all involved. While that might sound intimidating and intense, impact play can be whatever level of intensity one wants to. It can vary from gentle playful spanking to a walloping with an elaborate array of implements that leave a happy receiver with bruises all over.

While all sex acts should always be discussed before they happen, because of this variance and possibility of harm to the receiver, it’s especially important to talk to a partner in depth before bringing out the paddles and floggers. This way, everyone involved can have a discussion about safety, boundaries, and preferences. When talking to a partner about impact play, be sure to establish safe words to halt play, areas on the body that are okay and not okay to hit (and do some research beforehand to learn about these safe zones), how soft or hard to strike, and what toys to use.

Impact toys can be made rom different kinds of materials, including leather, faux leather, suede, wood, rubber, and plastic. Depending on the material, shape, and size of the implement, it can cause different kinds of pain, differentiated as “thuddy” or “stingy”. A “thuddy” sensation refers to pain that is felt deeper in the body, while “stingy” describes pain that is felt on the surface of the skin. If you’re curious, you can test these sensations on your thigh with your hand. A slap with an open hand causes much more of a sting compared with a closed-fist punch, which offers more of a thud. Each implement will cause both types of pain, but some lean more towards one than the other. This list of toys is organized from least to most painful.


The tool that perhaps everyone begins impact play with, your own hand is perfectly equipped for hitting your consenting play partner. It’s free, you already own it, and it can be used to create a range of different sensations. As mentioned above, an open palm with fingers together will cause the most sting and a wonderful noise. Cupping the hand will give another different feel and sound, and making a fist will change things even more. Using a hand to first try impact play is great practice for what sorts of sensations the receiving person enjoys, which can lead to ideas on which toy to try next.


A classic paddle is often the next step after using hands. These toys are generally broad, flat, and made of firmer materials like wood. They offer one of the widest impact areas among implements, and have quite the variance in stingy and thuddy sensations. Thuddier toys tend to be heavier and more rigid, while something will sting more if it’s flexible and thin. Something with a texture will feel different than one with a smooth surface. A paddle with a pattern may even leave marks shaped like those patterns! Paddles don’t take much practice to aim and use, so they’re perfect for someone just starting out in impact play.


A Riding Crop  is like a mini paddle, but instead of a short handle and large broad impact end, it has a long thin handle with a small flat surface on the end. Because the area of contact is so much smaller, crops have much more sting than a paddle. They’re also a bit harder to aim with because of the long handle, and can take a bit more practice to get used to.


A flogger is a bundle of long strips of material (often leather, rubber, or rope) attached at a handle. Like paddles, these can vary in thud and sting depending on the material of the tassles, but unlike paddles, they offer more variance in sensations depending on how the tool is moved. These are more difficult to aim, and therefore require a little more research before using. It is recommended to learn how to use the tool correctly through video tutorials or in-person lessons, and then practice on a pillow or other object before using (gently to begin with) on a person.


A whip is not a tool for beginners. One of the most painful of impact implements, a whip is a long single strand of material. With this single point of contact, these toys are incredibly stingy and can leave quite the welt. These require lots of practice to ensure no harm comes to the person being hit.


A cane is a long rod, sometimes with a curve on the end just like a cane someone would use to help themselves walk. These tools are sure to leave quite the mark. Canes are only recommended for those with prior impact experience, and those who are sure that they enjoy pain. If pain is what you want, a smaller, more flexible cane will cause the most, while a heavier, larger one will be a bit less intense.

As with any sex toy, each person will have their own likes and dislikes. Some folks adore impact toys, while others simply can’t fathom why someone would find sexual gratification from pain. No matter what side you lean towards or what impact toy strikes your fancy, what matters in the end is safety and consent. Communicate, negotiate, and explore what feels good to you.

By: Sammi
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