Bedroom Insider

A blog about relationships, intimacy and sex toys.

Friday, April 28, 2017

12 Things Porn Gets Wrong

sexy couple in shower

With the ubiquity of porn, it seems like many people see others having sex before they take a sex ed class. Porn might be a great way to enjoy some downtime (and we have nothing against it in general), but it isn't a good source for sex ed (unless you're watching a hybrid porn/sex ed flick like those by jessica drake), and the lessons you take out from it can be misleading if not dangerous. It's not always easy to spot what's real, fake or harmful, either. Read on to discover 12 things porn gets wrong.

1. Perpetual Erections

Men in porn always have impressive boners. They never get soft. And they can keep it up, literally, for hours. But erections aren't always never-ending (nor does every man have an 8-inch penis – or need to!).

2. Cunnilingus

It's awesome to see people going down on women in porn as it's a reminder that the orgasm gap between men and women may slowly be closing. But you have to remember that porn is filmed to please the viewer (who is often male), and that what's happening may not be realistic.

When it comes to oral sex, this means there's more movement than there may actually be, including awkward motorboating of vulvas. You don't see the consistent techniques that are often necessary for a woman to get off. After all, that would quickly become boring for the audience.

3. No Foreplay

In porn, everyone is ready to go at a moment's notice. But that's now how it works in real life. Both men and women need some time to connect with their partners and bodies. Enter foreplay: making out, dry humping, fingering, oral sex and sensual massage, just to name a few. But these activities in porn films are often rushed and lackluster.

4. Long Fingernails

Most porn starlets have French tips that would be beautiful in most settings but don't actually make sense when it comes to sex, especially fingering. One of the basic tenets of fingering either a vagina or anus is to keep your nails tripped short and filed clean to prevent possible scratches or cuts in your partner's most intimate parts. And those scrapes aren't just painful in the moment; they can make it easier to get an infection (bacterial or STI).

If you do like your manicure, you can still finger someone. Just push a cotton ball into the end of a rubber glove that you wear during the activity to make it more comfortable and safe.

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

What Goes in a Sex-On-The-Go Kit?

Woman holding condom behind her back

You’ve waited for this moment all day. Clothes are coming off, breathing is getting heavier, hands are roaming. As passions escalate, you both pause, looking at one another with the “time to get a condom” face. You didn’t bring one. They didn’t bring one. You’re condomless and heartbroken.

Whether you’re off on a one night stand, casual fling, or a date with your committed partner, being unprepared for a sexual encounter is certainly a mood-killer. To make things a bit easier, we recommend packing up a “sex-on-the-go” kit, a case filled with safer sex supplies and a few other handy tidbits to grab when you’re in a hurry. Of course, these are only a few ideas, and you’re free to take creative liberties as you please. Fit three condoms and a lube packet in a coin purse, or fill a backpack to the brim with dildos. The possibilities are only limited by your imagination.

Barrier methods:

Whether you use condoms, dental dams, gloves, or in-condoms, a hookup kit always starts with safer-sex materials. Pack your favorite protection, but also keep a few different options on hand (non-latex if you don't know your partner’s allergies, or condoms of different sizes to ensure a comfortable and safer fit!). Remember that if this kit goes unused for some time to check the expiration dates, as expired condoms are more prone to breakage. (Bonus tip: In a pinch, a dental dam can be created by unrolling a condom and cutting it up the middle.)

Monday, April 17, 2017

Know Your Birth Control Options

Woman holding condoms

Birth control is crucial to preventing pregnancy, and you'll find the right option no matter your lifestyle, price range or preferences. But there are so many options, how do you choose the best fit? Keep reading to determine which birth control is for you.

Barrier Methods

A barrier method blocks sperm from moving into your uterus where it would fertilize the egg. Most barrier methods can be paired with spermicide to further increase efficacy. It is worth noting that Nonoxynol-9, which is the active ingredient in spermicide, is quite abrasive and can cause micro-tears to sensitive tissue. Studies have shown that using spermicide can actually increase the rate of STI transmission.

Barrier methods of birth control typically don't have the same sort of side effects as hormonal methods. You might have a reaction to latex in your condoms, but you can simply choose to use condoms made from a different material.


How it works: A thin sheath of latex (or polyurethane, lambskin or polyisoprene for those with a latex allergy) prevents ejaculate from leaving the vagina. Use a condom once and toss it.

You can buy condoms in a variety of shapes, sizes and colors. They even come in various flavors. Some include lube and spermicide for extra protection. Unique textures can add to the experience.

Condoms are available from a variety of retailers at an affordable price, and you may be able to get them for free from your family planning provider.

Who it's for: Everyone who wants to prevent pregnancy and transmission of certain STIs, anyone who does not have birth control coverage, and people who do not like hormonal birth control.

Female Condoms

How it works: The female condom doesn't look like the male condom. It's a much larger bag-like tube with a reinforced lip that you pinch to insert. Part of the condom remains outside of the vagina,

Who it's for: People who want extra skin-to-skin STI protection, well-endowed partners, and women who want to take control of their sex lives.