Bedroom Insider

A blog about relationships, intimacy and sex toys.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Intro To Sex Toys For Men

When it comes to sex toys it often seems like girls have all the fun. Recently sex toy manufacturers are starting to realize that some men may want something more than their own hand to help them in solo play. Some toys have been around for a long time but haven’t been explored or are simply not talked about much. There are many new toys too. You may be looking for some new ideas for sex toys for yourself or for your partner but some find the idea of male oriented sex toys a bit intimidating. Just as women are breaking free of sex toy stigma and normalizing the use of toys, so should men. To get you started, let’s take a walk through the men’s toy section and explain some of the options you have available to you.

Masturbation Sleeves

Sometimes your hand is not enough. It does a great job but there’s little variety unless, well, you change hands. Masturbation sleeves provide you with an option to enhance this stimulation with a variety of textures, pressure and sensations. The masturbation sleeves that I’m talking about here are not enclosed in rigid plastic but are the soft sleeve where you can feel the pressure of you own hand. Sleeves can come in body safe TPE (Thermo Plasticplastic Elastomor) or silicone. Some are closed at one end, which provides more suction. The open-ended sleeves are helpful if you don’t want too much stimulation at the head of the penis, you’re not a fan of lots of suction, or to use in conjunction with oral sex from another partner. Inside the sleeve can be found a variety of textures making it easy to find one that works for you or, better yet, gives you a variety to choose from.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

When Sex Hurts

During an activity that commonly brings about pleasure and joy, painful sex can certainly put a damper on the mood. Painful sex can happen to anyone and there are many common culprits. Many can be treated without medical intervention and some are best addressed with your gynecologist. 

Lack of Lubrication

This is probably the most common. When you become aroused, your body produces lubricant in your vagina. Sometimes this lubricant is not adequate enough for penetrative sex and without additional lubricant, tearing and pulling can lead to discomfort. Keep some lubricant handy bedside and apply liberally. And don’t worry, the amount of lubricant you naturally produce is not a reflection on how aroused you are. 

Too Deep of Penetration

In certain positions or if your partner is very large, you can be experiencing discomfort from deep penetration. The force of a penis of object ramming against your cervix can cause intense pain. If this is the case, try positions that allow for more shallow penetration. 

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Pervertables – Your Introduction to DIY Kink

With all of the hype still surrounding 50 Shades of Grey, and the interest in BDSM (Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/submission, and/or Sadism/Masochism), there has never been a better time to explore your kinky side. Now before you start worrying about spending money on all new toys and props, look around your house. You’ve got a treasure trove of DIY kinky toys already in your house waiting for you to play with. 

Silk Neck Tie

You don’t need to splurge on rope or bondage tape when you have a silk tie hanging around. This can easily be used to restrain your partner in all sorts of erotic positions. A silk neck tie also doubles as an instant blindfold. For an added level of fun, take the tie directly off from your partner, blindfold them, and begin your seduction. Losing their sense of sight will enhance their remaining ones and leave them wondering what you will do next. 

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Female Ejaculation 101

 Female Ejaculation

Female ejaculation, also known as squirting or gushing, has gone from myth to reality and back to myth about as many times as the g-spot. While some are touting that it, like the g-spot, doesn’t exist there are still many others whose experience say otherwise. Female ejaculation does happen; it just doesn’t happen to everyone and may not happen all the time. Let’s look into the mechanics behind female ejaculation, the difference between ejaculation and squirting/gushing, and dispel some misconceptions. Perhaps you’ll gain greater understanding of why you do it if you already do it or give you ideas of how to get it going if you’ve never experienced it.

A History Lesson

Reports of female ejaculation have shown up in ancient literature. It’s written about in the Kama Sutra, in 4th century China, in ancient Greece and Rome, 16th century Japan, the South Pacific, even in Catholic documents dating back to the Middle Ages. In the 16th and 17th centuries we find references in a couple of physician’s documents, Dutch physician Laevinius Lemnius in the 16th century and François Mauriceau in the 17th century. In the 17th century, Dutch anatomist Regnier de Graaf’s studies included female ejaculation and he was the earliest to begin to identify a part of the vagina that he linked to the male prostate. This made him the first to refer to the periurethral glands as the female prostate. Studies continued up until the 19th century when Alexander Skene would also identify the periurethral glands (glands around the urethra) that would be later known as the Skene Glands. Ernst Gräfenberg’s work in the 20th century provide more knowledge about this erogenous or erotic spot in the vagina, now known at the Gräfenberg or G-spot, while also observing female ejaculation. Interest in female ejaculation has only recently come to the forefront of both conversation and research.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Sexy Games

You may have seen that section of the sex shop, the one with card games, board games, dice and other ways to make gaming sexy. You may be wondering if any of these are worth trying. If you’re unsure if sexy games are for you, here is a breakdown of the different types of games out there. Adult games can get a sexy evening started, a fun way to get to know your partner better, or an interesting way to try something new. This is not a review, mind you, but an overview of options to help you choose a game rather than just going for a random option. Let’s spin the wheel, toss those dice or pop that pop-o-matic and move down the game path to the different types of sex games available. With these games, everybody wins.

Domin8 Game

Domin8 Game

Board games

These games come in a wide variety of styles and game play but the overall objective is to arouse. They look like classic board games; a fold open board with a path of some sort to follow and a counting method like a spinner or dice. You can answer questions or perform the activities provided on the spaces or with cards. The graphics on some can tend toward the silly, but you can find more sensuous games out there. Some games are all about the pleasure, asking players to perform erotic actions as they move around the game board. Games like Lust!, Oral Sex Game, and Sex! (A sex trivia and sex play game) to name a few. There are several spicy spins on the Monopoly theme like Lover’sopoly, XXXopoly, and Sexopoly. Tease is a game that is edgier since it’s geared for group play but also more on the quality side in terms of production. Choose carefully as some games are just slightly sexier versions of adult drinking games or games like “I Never…” or “Would You Ever…” that are more about revealing fun sexy things about each other rather than performing anything sexual. That being said, conversation starter games can lead to some interesting playtime later.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Introducing Sex Toys - The Dildo

Woman with Vibrator

 The difference between a vibrator and a dildo is, just as one of the words implies, vibration. A vibrator is any sex toy that uses vibration for stimulation and can come in a variety of shapes. A dildo doesn’t vibrate and is penis or phallic shaped for penetration. A dildo can have a pocket to insert a bullet vibe to convert it into a vibrator. Dildos shapes may not vary as much a vibrator but there are still lots of options out there. Here is an overview to help you pick one out that works for you. Have one that works for everything or have a variety to suit your needs.

Phallic shape is subject to interpretation

Merriam-Webster defines a dildo as “An object resembling a penis used for sexual stimulation.” Dildos can come in a variety of phallic shapes. Some are exquisitely detailed and realistic in shape. There are almost as many varieties in life like dildos as there are real life penises. They come in different lengths, different widths, and different textures. You can find shorter more slender ones, bigger and wider ones, a thickly flanged head or a slim one, balls attached or ball free. There are even dildos that have detailed veins on the shaft to add more texture. You can pick the color that suits your taste since you can find them in a variety of skin tones and some wacky colors too. You can also make a cast of someone’s penis for a homemade custom-made dildo. This can be tricky, and a little messy, but if all works out right you’ll have a duplicate of the penis you know and love. If realistic is not what you’re looking for, there are shapes with no detail at all just simple cylinders. There are others that still look somewhat like a penis but have more artistic shapes and textures designed not to replicate an actual penis but to enhance pleasure with spirals, nubs and swirls. While dildos can be used for any kind of insertion, you can get dildos specifically shaped and designed for anal play.

Monday, February 10, 2014

Condom Awareness: A Variety Of Condoms To Suit Your Needs

Assorted Condoms

February is National Condom Awareness month. It’s a good time to look at what kinds of condoms are currently available. If you haven’t picked any up in a while, or you’ve been sticking to your favorite brand, you may have missed some of the alternatives that have been developed. This will be an overview of condom materials that might teach you something new or give you something different to look for next time you go shopping. Condoms have come a long way since the early use of linen, animal intestines, tortoise shell and galvanized rubber. Latex is not the only material on the block. Let’s look at all the options available today.

Latex condom

Latex condoms have been around since 1920 when it replaced vulcanized rubber. Vulcanized rubber, and later cement dipped rubber, were thicker and less comfortable. The invention of latex rubber improved this significantly. Latex was thinner and could be mass-produced with automated machines, a big improvement on the earlier handmade condoms. Latex hasn’t changed much in nearly 100 years. They tightened quality control, which produced better quality condoms. The 50’s also saw the introduction of lubricated condoms and the reservoir tip. Spermicides were later added, although Nonoxynol 9 is no longer recommended since research has shown it may increase the risk of HIV transmission, as well as HPV plus it can be an irritant to vaginal and anal tissue. There’s more variety in sizes and shapes now with ribbed, textured, colored and flavored latex condoms readily available. Latex produces a thin condom with elasticity and durability that makes it the most popular type used today. There are some drawbacks. Some people are allergic to latex causing redness, dryness, burning and other reactions. It’s also not compatible with oil-based products. Oil base lube, petroleum jelly, and mineral oil will cause the latex to break down and tear.