Bedroom Insider

A blog about relationships, intimacy and sex toys.

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Three New High-End Sex Toys We're Dying to Try

Masturbation is different for everyone. While some people use masturbation to quickly and frantically orgasm ASAP, touching oneself can also be a special time for others. It’s a chance to let go of worries and spend some time getting to know and love your body. Luckily, these toys should be great for both these sorts of folks (or anyone in between!), and man do they feel fancy. All of them are pricey at over $100, rechargeable and made with silicone so your bits stay safe. These toys are like caviar for your clitoris, prosecco for your penis, or truffles for your tush. They’ve just been released within the past few months, and everyone is dying to get their hands on them.

The b-Vibe Triplet 

b-Vibe first became popular for their Rimming plug, and then came out with the Trio and the Novice. The Triplet is their latest edition to the lineup, and these vibrating anal beads are cool for so many reasons. First of all, it has two motors; one in the bottom and one in the middle portion. These bumps are a classic anal bead shape, with the largest bead at the bottom (1.2”), and smallest at the top (.8”). If you’ve ever wanted a partner to make your butt vibrate with the push of a button, now is your chance because this baby is operated via remote control. Even if you’re not handing it over to a partner, how fab is it to not have to reach down to change the settings?

The We-Vibe Wish 

Squishy, soft, and sweet are three words to describe this adorable vibrator. Meant for buzzing against external body parts like the clitoris or penis, the We-Vibe Wish is a palm sized toy perfect for broad stimulation, but with the added bonus of a small tip for more precise action. It features a “PowerPulse” Technology that delivers a pulsing sensation different from any other toy on the market. Described as “waves of pleasure”, the tech sure sounds fun to us! Like the Triplet, you can hand over the controls to a partner either in your bedroom or across the world via the We-Connect app. Use a pre-programmed pattern, create your own custom settings, or tap the screen to control the vibes. The choice is yours.

Le Wand 

Everything about this vibrator feels luxurious: the shape, the colors (grey and pearl white), the simple yet elegant buttons. Heck, even the name sounds fancy. The Le Wand massager is a powerful thing, rumored to be wonderfully rumbly with ten vibrations strengths and twenty patterns. Unlike many wand vibrators, this one has a flexible neck perfect for getting just the right angle. Continuing the theme of luxury, the Le Wand comes with a handy little travel case, as well as a neat head cover patterned with a different texture for a different kind of pleasure.

So if you’ve been hankering to treat your body to some fancy new toys, check out the Triplet, Wish, or Le Wand. It only takes some imagination to close your eyes and picture yourself lounging on silk sheets pressing these toys into or against your pampered body. Lay back, relax, and enjoy your fanciest wank yet.

By: Sammi
Follow on Twitter @Squeaky_Springs

Thursday, June 15, 2017

How to Talk About Sex Part Three: After Sex

Happy young couple lying and hugging in bed
We all love that moment after a good shag when we finally roll off one another, panting heavily with sweat pouring down our backs. Flopping down on the bed and lying in a metaphorical (or physical) puddle of pleasure is nothing short of divine, but after that rush fades to a glow, it’s time to talk.

Talking about the sex you just experienced with your partner (or partner for the night) can bring you closer, help you explore kinks, and best of all, improve your sex! As we’ve mentioned in the past few posts on communicating about sex, doing so can be hard. Cultural norms and our own shyness can prevent us from speaking up about sex, but once we practice doing so, it becomes so much easier. Don’t know where to start? Here are five things you should chat about right after a romp.

How you’re feeling

First things first, check in with yourself and your partner. Sex can leave us feeling euphoric, but it can also cause feelings of vulnerability, discomfort, and other less-than-stellar emotions. Letting your partner know how you’re feeling can also let them know what you need, whether that might be a snack, some space, or some cuddles.

The good

Everyone loves compliments, and sex is something so many people are self-conscious about. Your words of encouragement can help combat all the negativity people are bombarded with everyday. Be sincere in these compliments. In the short term, saying nice things can give a great confidence boost and make your partner happy. Voice what you really love, and next time they might take the hint and do it again. In the long term, repeated guidance toward the aspects of sex that drive you wild will help form the best sex ever.

The bad

If the person in your bed will only be there for the night, feel free to skip this conversation and send them on their way. However, If they’ll be back, it might be handy to let them know they were a little too toothy with that blowjob. This shouldn’t be a list of criticisms intended to hurt their feelings, but one or two comments on not pulling your hair so hard or avoiding ticklish spots will go a long way.

Friday, May 26, 2017

12 Sex Myths That Are Untrue

Sexy young couple kissing and playing in bed.

No matter how much we try to educate people are sex, some sex myths just keep getting passed around. These urban legends are so persistent that you might believe them to be true, but we're here to shed some light on the subject.

Myth: Guys Always Want Sex and There's Something Wrong If They Don't

This goes hand-in-hand with the sex myth that a guy is always hard and ready to go, but both are simply wrong. Not every man wants sex all the time, and a man who wants sex may not be able to get erect, even if he's younger than is typically associated with erectile dysfunction. But society expects men to be on standby at all times when it comes to sex, and men who don't want sex at a given moment or who can't get hard are treated as less masculine.

One thing to remember is that a semi-erect penis can still function, and sex can include all sorts of activities that aren't penis-centric.

Myth: The Goal of Sex Is Orgasm

This sex myth is dead wrong if only because there's no one goal of sex. It might be pleasure, which you can achieve without orgasm. Perhaps you want to feel desired or closer to your partner. You might want to cheer them up. Sex might be giving your mood a boost.
There's no one reason to have sex (or to masturbate!), and that's perfectly fine.

Myth: Women Only Want Sex for Men and Need to Be Convinced to Have It

Many women like sex and some enjoy and desire sex more than men or their partners. Secondly, we should never coerce people into sex. That only perpetuates rape culture. When it comes to sex, only an enthusiastic “Yes” is a yes.

Thursday, May 18, 2017

How to Talk About Sex Part Two: During Sex

Gentle young couple lying and making love in bed

Watching a hollywood sex scene would have you thinking that the way sex works is a neat little equation of two people making out, the scene fading to black, and some moaning. The next second, the pair is lying in bed with the sheets pulled up to their chests.

As much as movies and porn will try to make you believe it, sex is not seamless. Just as there are moans and giggles and pleasure, there are hydration breaks, spilled lube, an accidental knee to the stomach, and bumped teeth. There are farts and queefs and even *gasp* talking.

If you feel uncomfortable speaking up in bed, don’t worry, you’re not alone, and it’s not your fault. Our culture tells us it’s weird and awkward to use our words during sex. We’re just expected to know exactly what to do. Of course, this isn’t the case at all, and it leaves so many people without the pleasure they deserve. In the heat of the moment, it can be so hard to say the words “Um, actually, my clit is a little to the right”, so here is a little guide with different ways to get you more comfortable using your voice in bed.

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

How to Talk About Sex Part One: Before Sex

Tender young couple lying and hugging on couch

For some reason, sex tips from popular magazines always involve some type of physical movement. Usually it’s “wiggle your tongue this way” or “move your hand that way”. They’ll list uncomfortable, wild positions or expensive lingerie that they claim will get you in the right mood, which will naturally lead to flawless sex. Of course, in practice, these grand ideas often fall short.

The truth is, the best way to get the sex you want is to ask for it. Your partner can’t read your mind, and as effortless and perfect porn may make sex look, what porn and movies don’t show are the directions given beforehand on what the people should do to make it look so effortless. The reason it looks effortless is because they planned it to be that way by talking about it. This series on Cirilla’s Bedroom Insider tackles what you should be talking about to get the best sex ever, as well as ways to make talking about sex less awkward. Here we’ll focus on what to talk about before any sex even happens.

Protection and boundaries

Of course, the first step to getting the good stuff is avoiding the bad stuff. Talking about STI and pregnancy prevention methods and your personal sexual boundaries before you even hop into bed is a way to make sure everything is clear and laid out. It helps avoid stressful in-the-moment situations. Ask your partner about their preferences by simply saying “What sorts of pregnancy/STI protection do you use?” (For example: condoms, dental dams, hormonal contraceptives), and let your partner know your own protection preferences by saying something like “Is it cool if we use condoms? I get so much more into it if I know I’m having safe sex”. If you’re adventuring into kinky territory, come up with a safeword, and clarify boundaries by asking “Are there any parts of your body you don’t want touched?”.  If you explicitly mention what you don’t want, achieving what you do want will be so much easier.

Friday, April 28, 2017

12 Things Porn Gets Wrong

sexy couple in shower

With the ubiquity of porn, it seems like many people see others having sex before they take a sex ed class. Porn might be a great way to enjoy some downtime (and we have nothing against it in general), but it isn't a good source for sex ed (unless you're watching a hybrid porn/sex ed flick like those by jessica drake), and the lessons you take out from it can be misleading if not dangerous. It's not always easy to spot what's real, fake or harmful, either. Read on to discover 12 things porn gets wrong.

1. Perpetual Erections

Men in porn always have impressive boners. They never get soft. And they can keep it up, literally, for hours. But erections aren't always never-ending (nor does every man have an 8-inch penis – or need to!).

2. Cunnilingus

It's awesome to see people going down on women in porn as it's a reminder that the orgasm gap between men and women may slowly be closing. But you have to remember that porn is filmed to please the viewer (who is often male), and that what's happening may not be realistic.

When it comes to oral sex, this means there's more movement than there may actually be, including awkward motorboating of vulvas. You don't see the consistent techniques that are often necessary for a woman to get off. After all, that would quickly become boring for the audience.

3. No Foreplay

In porn, everyone is ready to go at a moment's notice. But that's now how it works in real life. Both men and women need some time to connect with their partners and bodies. Enter foreplay: making out, dry humping, fingering, oral sex and sensual massage, just to name a few. But these activities in porn films are often rushed and lackluster.

4. Long Fingernails

Most porn starlets have French tips that would be beautiful in most settings but don't actually make sense when it comes to sex, especially fingering. One of the basic tenets of fingering either a vagina or anus is to keep your nails tripped short and filed clean to prevent possible scratches or cuts in your partner's most intimate parts. And those scrapes aren't just painful in the moment; they can make it easier to get an infection (bacterial or STI).

If you do like your manicure, you can still finger someone. Just push a cotton ball into the end of a rubber glove that you wear during the activity to make it more comfortable and safe.

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

What Goes in a Sex-On-The-Go Kit?

Woman holding condom behind her back

You’ve waited for this moment all day. Clothes are coming off, breathing is getting heavier, hands are roaming. As passions escalate, you both pause, looking at one another with the “time to get a condom” face. You didn’t bring one. They didn’t bring one. You’re condomless and heartbroken.

Whether you’re off on a one night stand, casual fling, or a date with your committed partner, being unprepared for a sexual encounter is certainly a mood-killer. To make things a bit easier, we recommend packing up a “sex-on-the-go” kit, a case filled with safer sex supplies and a few other handy tidbits to grab when you’re in a hurry. Of course, these are only a few ideas, and you’re free to take creative liberties as you please. Fit three condoms and a lube packet in a coin purse, or fill a backpack to the brim with dildos. The possibilities are only limited by your imagination.

Barrier methods:

Whether you use condoms, dental dams, gloves, or in-condoms, a hookup kit always starts with safer-sex materials. Pack your favorite protection, but also keep a few different options on hand (non-latex if you don't know your partner’s allergies, or condoms of different sizes to ensure a comfortable and safer fit!). Remember that if this kit goes unused for some time to check the expiration dates, as expired condoms are more prone to breakage. (Bonus tip: In a pinch, a dental dam can be created by unrolling a condom and cutting it up the middle.)