Bedroom Insider

A blog about relationships, intimacy and sex toys.


Friday, July 18, 2014

Guide to Sensual Massage




Sexy Couple Massage

There’s probably very few of us who’d say no to a massage. Even the simplest neck massage after a long tough day can feel amazing. Massage stimulates blood flow, reduces stress and tension, while soothing overworked muscles. All these things can help put us in a sexy mood. You can use a combination of traditional message techniques with some sensual touches to make massage time a part of sexy time. It can be a wonderful part of foreplay, especially after a long or particularly stressful day when your head and body may not be feeling too hot. It can also be great bonding time with your partner. Here are some tips for a sexy and sensual massage.

Setting The Stage

As at a spa, the atmosphere in the room needs to be conducive to relaxation. You wouldn’t have your client in a brightly lit cold room with lots of noise so you definitely wouldn’t want a sexy massage in the same environment. Set the mood with dim/soft lighting. Perhaps changing to low watt bulbs or light some candles. You can find candles that will melt into massage oil; they are low temp and safe for the skin. You can go a little old school and throw a scarf over a lamp for some mood lighting. Make sure the room is warm enough so your undressed partner is comfortable. Music can help to set the right tone too, pick something sexy and soothing. Eliminate any outside noises and distractions. And don’t forget to turn off your phone!

Having The Right Props

Your hands are your basic tools for a massage but you are not limited to them. A Magic Wand may be too intense for this kind of work, try a smaller vibrator for both the body massage and for more intimate massage later. You can even find fingertip vibrators. Professional masseuses recommend sweet almond oil or apricot kernel oil but you can also try a variety such as grape seed oil or coconut oil. Oils can’t be used internally and shouldn’t be used with a latex condom as oil breaks them down lessening their effectiveness. Oils can also promote bacterial infections and irritation if used internally. Avoid warming and cooling lotions as they can irritate intimate areas rather than stimulating. If you don’t want to worry about switching oils for internal use, get a massage oil that can also be used as a lubricant. You can even find flavored edible massage oil too. Check for parabens and glycerin, an all natural water based or silicone based massage oil to use for lube later is recommended. A titillating scent can help too with some vanilla or sandalwood. Just make sure what you’re adding is safe and your partner is no allergic. Have towels handy for clean up and use a massage table or the floor instead of the bed is you can. The bed can be too soft for a comfortable massage.

The Main Event

You’ve set you mood lighting, music and your implements out. You’ve found a comfortable place to have them lie down and now it’s time to lay your hands on them. Never squirt oil directly on the skin, apply onto your hands and rub them together. This will warm the oil before it hits the skin. Start gently with easy strokes so you don’t tired out too quickly. You don’t need to knead them the whole time either, use the palms of your hands or the flat between your knuckles more than your fingers. Start anywhere you like since a massage is more than just the back muscles. The whole body has erogenous zones so there are plenty of places to explore. An easy place to start could be the back with light long strokes from either side of the spine, up to the shoulders, around the side of the back to the buttocks then up along side the spine again. Take some time with the shoulders as many people carry all their tension there. Hips and lower back can lead to buttocks then the thighs, back of the knees, calves, and ankles. You can use a soft circular motion with your palms and can add light strokes with your fingertips. When massaging the feet use your thumbs along the soles and ball of the foot, don’t forget those toes too. Light strokes can feel teasingly good as long as it’s not too tickly in a way that destroys the mood. Add in the arms and hands, and don’t’ forget the sensitive areas of the wrist and inner elbow.

The Finale

The head should get some attention too with a neck massage. Use small circles at the temples and light strokes around the forehead, cheeks, and jaws. Even a scalp massage with your fingertips can feel amazing. Start anywhere you want; from the top down, feet up, back outward. You can add a sensual touch with your mouth by adding kisses, licks and nibbles while you massage. Pressing your whole body against them can make for some hot skin-to-skin contact. Once you’ve gotten them relaxed and aroused you can add intimate areas like the genitals, breast and nipples. A penis will enjoy a nice massage, as would labia, clitoris and vagina. Massage around the base of the penis and pubic mound, along the shaft and head. Don’t forget the frenulum, which is ripe with nerve endings. The pubic mound above the clitoris shouldn’t be ignored, along with the inner and outer labia. Some may even enjoy pressure around the anus. Consider a sensual massage a full body experience so you can add these areas throughout the massage or save them for the end.

The Curtain Call

This doesn’t have to end with sex. In fact, a great way to make a sensual massage a sexy and relaxing event is to eliminate sex as a necessary conclusion. Let it flow easily and naturally. Your partner may orgasm during the massage or they may enjoy just the massage and feel they don’t need a happy ending. Knowing that it’s ok will take the pressure off. Don’t expect the massage to be instantly reciprocated either. Let your partner enjoy the afterglow, I’m sure they’ll pay you back in full with your own sensual massage another time. During the event, stay in tune with your partner by watching and listening to their reactions. Soft moans and sighs tell you you’re on the right track; muscle tightening and strained reactions tell you you’re off. Softly ask if they would like more of something, or less of something. In lieu of penetrative sex (as using just your fingers and mouth is still sex) you can choose to cuddle with warm soft full body contact, hugs and kisses. Either way, enjoy this intimate and bonding moment with your partner.


By: Technogeisha
Follow on Twitter @Technogeisha

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